Tonight at 8, Monochrom will pour several gallons of Coca Cola into a pot and boil it down until the residue left behind can be molded into a brick. Seriously, how can you go wrong here?

Machine Project
Tuesday June 21th 8pm
1200 D North Alvarado Street
Los Angeles, CA 90026
213-483-8761
map and directions

See the full calendar with links to buy tickets and our recommendations at losanjealous.com/shows/

***Recommended Show of the Week***
David Byrne, Arcade Fire @ Hollywood Bowl
Head to the Bowl Sunday night to watch the indie rock version of Rocky V. Aging veteran Rocky (David Byrne) takes the young hotshot Tommy Gunn (Arcade Fire) under his wing. Tommy wins some matches, gets really arrogant and then drops Rocky. Gunn gains the title belt but loses favor with the masses and realizes the only way to gain respect is to beat Rocky one-on-one…

MONDAY
Enon, Thunderbirds Are Now @ Troubadour
Digable Planets @ House of Blues

TUESDAY
Futureheads @ Henry Fonda
Spoon @ Avalon
Junior Senior @ Spaceland
Mia Doi Todd @ Tangier
David Poe @ Largo
Dressy Bessy @ Echo
Nanci Griffith @ Amoeba (free)

WEDNESDAY
Oxford Collapse @ Smell
The Like @ Spaceland
Aeon Spoke @ King King
Embrace @ Troubadour

THURSDAY
Bell X1 @ Viper Room
Cloud Room, Let’s Go Sailing, Say Hi To Your Mom @ Echo (tickets at door)

FRIDAY
Louis XIV @ Avalon
Madlib, Peanut Butter Wolf, J.Rocc, MED @ Vanguard
Madeleine Peyroux, Gabriela Anders @ Greek
Bell X1 @ Hotel Cafe
Dredg @ Henry Fonda

SATURDAY
Jurassic 5, Donnas, Ozomatli, Louis XIV, Moving Units, VHS or BETA, Autolux, and more @ Electric Daisy Carnival
Mountain Goats @ Troubadour
Grant Lee Phillips @ Largo

SUNDAY
David Byrne, Arcade Fire @ Hollywood Bowl
Preservation Hall Jazz Band @ Amoeba (free)

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[email protected].

Tonight @ 8, head over to Machine Project to catch Austrian art geeks Monochrom delete a bunch of stuff with magnets. Leave your credit cards and iPod at home.

Machine Project
1200 D North Alvarado Street
Los Angeles, CA 90026
213-483-8761
map and directions

The next taker in Westwood’s hot retail scene is L.A.’s own American Apparel. AA has nabbed a long-vacant Village storefront for its next bricks and mortar. (Two doors down from Victoria’s Secret.)

The rapidly-metastasizing hipster anti-brand brand that built a reputation on a self-described “sweatshop-free” ethos, brings with it a bit of baggage, none of which the average UCLA sophomore with step-mommy’s AmEx will give a squirrel’s ass about. Despite higher-than-average wages, their workers have been kept from unionizing. Some might be disinclined to channel funds to a company whose founder has been known to whip it (yes, IT) out during interviews. Then there’s the whole matter of the ads, those ubiquitous ads, which all gender/political/sexual issues aside, are just as flat-out tired as those iPod spots.

There was an eloquent piece in the NYT a few days ago wherein a reporter attempts (unsuccessfully) to reconcile the progressive appeal of American Apparel with it’s regressive image campaign. (It’s also copied here, in case the article is locked in the paid archives already.)

If nothing else, AA’s expansion (locations forthcoming on Melrose and on Main St. in Santa Monica) will be a case study in how a once-hip brand bloats and dilutes its cutting-edge appeal in trade for a wider piece of the market.

This just announced in my inbox: GR Silverlake will be hosting a drawing battle from 3 to 5 pm this Sunday (6/19). Take on Drunken Master (Kiyoshi Nakazawa) for 60 seconds. Just don’t draw too good or he may go wuxia on on you. Who is to say. Personally, I can’t draw much more than a cigar-smoking pig but I may give it a go nonetheless.

Los Angeles-based model-turned-designer Paige Adams-Gellar (phew! hyphen overload!) has stepped up to address a desperate need in the marketplace for another brand of $200 jeans.

A failed actress and USC alum, Paige is a jeans model, and apparently, the jeans model for the industry–her figure was used by many designers as the basis for the cuts that normal-bodied females are torturing their bodies to stuff themselves into. Then she had the revelation that she could also make lots of cash in the high margin jeanswear game. Her new line follows in the large footsteps of the Vernon-based (Vernon!) 7 Jeans, pioneers of the overpriced, overhyped local jeans market.

Paige Premium Denim looks to exploit the high-end pants market with a distinctly local twist–varieties of her jeans come with cute names like “Little Santa Monica Crop,” “Mulholland Drive Twill Trouser” and “Laurel Canyon 5 Pocket” (the favorite style of that sitcom actress whose movie star husband left her for that movie actress). Here is an insanely detailed analysis of the differences of the cuts and fabrics. Sporting these at the Beverly Coffee Bean is sure to help land you an extra role in a mansion party scene on Entourage.

LACMA joins the summer blockbuster fray with it’s monster King Tut exhibit which opens today, following last night’s opening gala. Photos from the event are here. Who knew Drew Barrymore was into Tut?

Sure, you could go see that little Margaret Killagan thing at REDCAT, but we know you like your art to come BIG.

This Stateside tour of artifacts related to the ancient Egyptian deity Tutankhamun (or simply, “Tut,” as he was known to friends) is being promoted as a “farewell tour.” (Alas, the Rolling Stones have made no such a promise.)

However, after you pay $30 for your ticket (adult weekend price), you might be slightly pissed off to learn that the most identifiable image of King Tut–the gilded burial mask–the very one displayed prominently on all the ads for the exhibit–is not included as part of the show. You’ll be all like, what’s up with that? How can I gets my Tut on proper without the burial mask?! Damn.

Redemption for this egregious exclusion, though, will come from the LACMA gift shop. Losanjealous has learned exclusively that there will be various King Tut-related items that one can purchase upon exiting the exhibit, to remind one that, yes, they did in fact see the King Tut exhibit at LACMA in 2005.

How many times is the following scene sure to play out on the streets of Los Angeles this coming summer:

“I say old chap, I see you’ve got yourself a King Tut t-shirt. Did you perchance happen to see the exhibit at LACMA? Is that 100% cotton? And if so, is it pre-shrunk?”

“Why, yes, as a matter of fact I did take in the exhibit. Hence my donning this t-shirt featuring King Tut’s image, to notify others, such as yourself, that, yes, in fact, I have seen the exhibit.”

“Brilliant! Your t-shirt has convinced me that I must see the exhibit as well. I do hope they have size XXL, as I am a stout lad, as you can no doubt see.”

Ladies and gentlemen – as soon as we’ve amassed $36.90 total (on sale from a dodgy-looking discount site), our little experiment begins. I will order a case of Stallone Pudding and subside on nothing but the pudding until it is gone. Not so much as a single green bean shall I eat until the pudding is gone. I am hoping to make the pudding last at least two weeks, and it is no exaggeration to say that I may very well die from lack of nutrition. The various risks will be determined by the doctors I discuss this experiment with prior to the beginning of the experiment.

The bottom line is that I will live the daily life of a Stallone inasmuch as I can. If that has to include sparring matches with Frank Stallone, so be it. Through pudding I will Stallone Size myself. Along with a team of doctors I will be measuring pudding effectiveness, pudding-to-body fat ratio, general stallone-appearance-generatingness, Italian Stallionness and tastiness. I will ultimately determine if, after one case of pudding (and nothing else), I look like Stallone in either face or body.

Is the proof indeed in the pudding? Click the button here to donate securely via paypal – visa or mastercard. Rest assured your payment is secure and the pudding will be eaten.

What are you waiting for… Stallone Size Me.

Bay Area artist Margaret Kilgallen’s unique approach to painting can be seen at the new exhibition “IN THE SWEET BYE & BYE” opening tonight at Redcat.

Her passion for folklore, craftsmanship and letterpress printing is evident throughout her work, from in her huge, bright murals to her small portraits of women, wanderers, surfers and hobos.

This is a posthumous showing as Kilgallen died of breast cancer at age 33 in 2001.

Opening reception: Wednesday, 15 June, 7pm to midnight
8pm – Live music by The Hallflowers, Peggy Honeywell, and Tommy Guerrero
10:30pm – Film screening of Bill Daniel’s Who is Bozo Texino?

Exhibition dates: 16 June – 21 August 2005

Phil Jackson will return to coach the Lakers next season. Jeanie Buss, Lakers Vice President and daughter of Lakers owner Jerry Buss, was instrumental in the reunion. Oh yeah, Jeanie is also Phil Jackson’s girlfriend of five years.

Jackson is expected to earn around $10 million a season, making him the highest paid coach in NBA history. Thanks Jeanie!

LA sports fans can now look forward to the Spurs sweeping the Lakers in the first round of next year’s NBA playoffs.

Related:
Jeanie Buss Executive Photograph

“The images in this film have not been sped up in any way.”

The style of photographer and video director David LaChapelle can’t be denied. Greased up celebrities and over-stylized, other-worldly scenes are his trademarks. LaChapelle puts the aesthetic into full-effect in this month’s release of “RIZE,” his feature documentary film debut.

The film captures the energy of a diverse form of dancing born out of the impoverished youth growing up in South Central LA. These kids want something better than the commercial Hip Hop stereotypes and gang-banging. They don’t shoot guns and sell drugs, they krump and clown.

Follow these Big Boyz and Little Mommas as they they take the battle to the floor. The LA release date is slated for June 24. For now, catch a sneak preview.

See the full calendar with links to buy tickets and our recommendations at losanjealous.com/shows/

***Recommended Show of the Week***
Keren Ann @ Buffalo Club
Israeli/Dutch/Javanese/Russian/French/New York singer-songwriter Keren Ann plays four LA shows this week, but we highly recommend checking out the sultry chanteuse at the classy Buffalo Club Wednesday night.

MONDAY
Hot Hot Heat @ Avalon
Hold Steady @ Troubadour
Lhasa @ Knitting Factory
Meat Beat Manifesto @ House of Blues
Josephine Foster, Molecules @ the Echo
Keren Ann @ Tangier

TUESDAY
Keren Ann @ Tangier
X @ Henry Fonda
The Coral @ Troubadour
Raveonettes @ Spaceland
Amos Lee @ Knitting Factory
Wilco & The Roots @ Greek Theater
Bright Eyes & The Faint @ Grand Olympic
Doves @ Wiltern
Stephen Malkmus @ El Rey
Michelle Shocked @ Amoeba (free)

WEDNESDAY
Keren Ann @ Buffalo Club
C Ray Walz @ Knitting Factory
Brigadier Jerry @ Echo
Raveonettes @ Spaceland

THURSDAY
Raveonettes @ Spaceland
Apostle of Hustle @ Echo
Irving, Alaska! @ Troubadour

FRIDAY
Aesop Rock, Mr. Lif @ Henry Fonda
Basement Jaxx, Royksopp @ Hollywood Bowl
Electrelane @ Troubadour
Blood Brothers @ El Rey
Keren Ann @ McCabe’s
Jude @ Largo
Juana Molina @ Knitting Factory

SATURDAY
Go-Betweens @ Troubadour
Jesse Sykes, Inara George @ El Cid

SUNDAY
Rilo Kiley, Feist @ Wiltern
Nikka Costa @ Temple Bar

You can also subscribe to our weekly Concert Calendar email by sending a message to
[email protected].

Losanjealous was rocked by a 5.6 magnitude earthquake with an epicenter near Indio, CA (ok, ok – Anza to be precise) approximately three minutes ago. Me whole building and body all shaky folks. Now it’s off to wine country.

Don’t know what to do with your Sunday? Head to Ojai immediately and let the juicing begin. I’ve been invited to the Ojai Wine Festival by a friend and her cousin, a self-proclaimed “partially wine-knowledged person who is not a bonafide wine snob but a good person to be around at such a festival” …

Having known about this event for a good 48 hours now, I’m just now getting around to Googling it and finding out what’s going on. Apparently our ticket grants us access to the goods of 50 wineries and three breweries – not a bad haul for $25 advanced. I’m just glad I’m not the one driving us back to LA.

I promise to drunkenly phonetxt field reports tomorrow. We’ll be there when the gate opens so we can start guzzling as much delectable central coast swill as possible. Think sideways, folks. On that vein, is it just me or does the chairman of the festival bear more than a passing resemblance to a crazed Paul Giamatti?

Bloc Party @ El Rey, June 3rd & 4th

Before Bloc Party’s 2nd night at the El Rey, fans were exchanging war stories. The audience came out battered and bruised by the overly enthusiastic crowd from the night before and no one expected anything less from the Saturday crowd. But this time they were prepared for the madness – hopefully.

Crowned as the future of music, Bloc Party started the set off on a bad foot. On the first song, the drum kit fell apart, no doubt from the abuse being taking on the band’s current tour. Frontman, Kele Okereke told everyone just to pretend that didn’t happen and the band
picked up right from where they left off. In a second they were back on track.

In a bold move, the 3rd song Bloc Party played was their American, radio friendly hit “Banquet” which initiated a mosh pit, and ended with exuberant clapping and thunderous cheers from theaudience. It’s sometimes problematic for a band to top their radio hit, but Bloc Party did it again and at least twice. During “She’s Hearing Voices” and “Helicopter” the room was ablaze with energy.

Kele also took a stab at the scalpers on Ebay, where a third of each night’s tickets appeared. With a passionate”…fuck EBAY,” he denounced the use of the popular bidding site which had marked up prices twofold.

As musicians Bloc Party are no slackers – Matt Tong is a skilled and dynamic drummer that will hold the title, at least at this show, as most excitable to watch. If Bloc Party’s plan is to take over America they are well on their way. Loaded with jerky beats, infectious grooves, cool robotic instrumentation and uncomplicated lyrics nothing should hold them back from setting us on fire.

Check out the full set of photos on audballtunes.