Brentwood Treehouse of Horror

Treehouse!It seems that a Brentwood couple, a producer and his screenwriter wife, have drawn the ire of their plastic surgeon neighbor over the planned construction of an elaborate treehouse next door. It seems that the plastic surgeon next door had a problem with the proposed treehouse providing an elevated vantage point which allowed for easy viewing of his hottubbing activities. You can’t make this stuff up, folks.

Reading this story several of the details jump out at you and smack you about the head. First off, dig this:

The builder, Roderick Wolgamott Romero, whose creations cost $50,000 and up, assembled the structure around three eucalyptus trees using reclaimed wood, salvaged windows and vintage stained glass from Buenos Aires. It features a large viewing deck with a railing made from tree branches from the lush backyard.

Set aside the sonorous name of this “renowned” builder of treehouses for a second. Or that he has built one of his treehouses for Sting. Or that Roderick the Treehouse Builder (soon to have his own reality show–contact me) moonlights as the lead singer of the band Sky Cries Mary. YCMTSUF*

This yuppie retro trending back to a simpler time bullshit reaks of a BoBo’s misguided notion of letting their kids be kids in this krazee technology driven world. (You can put the whole American Girl doll phenomenon under this same heading.) Let’s go back to the olden days, you know, when we used to build $50K treehouses with stained glass windows imported from Argentina. Add to this the tiny detail that their kid is currently 18 MONTHS OLD. So it’s a good 8, 9 years before the kid even gets up there. It’s pretty clear who’s childhood is really being bought here.

And this quote from the dad is priceless. No doubt he was the spark in the “Drew Carey” writers’ room:

“We just want to make this a magical place,” said Firestein, whose credits include “The Drew Carey Show” and “In Living Color.” “It’s as if the city has come in and said, ’We’re outlawing magic.’”

“Outlawing magic,” huh? You have to think that the AP stringer was framing the quote it for maximum absurdity by tucking in his ridiculous TV credits in same line. Well done, AP.

*You can’t make this stuff up, folks.