Profile: The Original Marty’s, Part Two

Previously on Profile: The Original Marty’s:

I grabbed the pigeon, got in the car and headed east on Pico. I didn’t make it that far. Just past La Cienega something caught my eye. The sun beat down. I turned the car around and eased into the lot.

The sun beat down. I turned the car around and eased into the lot of LA Burger. LA Burger is a flourescent pink shack right on Pico. You’d think it would be tough to miss. Nonetheless, LA being what it is, I had never seen the damn thing in my life until that moment. I opened the passenger door. Jeff (pigeon) hopped out and made a beeline for the tables at the back of the shack. I made my way around to the front and ordered up something called the ABC burger: Avocado, Bacon, Cheese. The man got right to work on it and soon I was eating. The patty at LA burger is an interesting thing. They actually thread cilantro leaves right into the patty. Imagine a green, frilly Abe Lincoln beard all the way around your beef patty, and you begin to get the idea. My interest was piqued immediately.

I polished off the ABC and began exploring the shack. I found Jeff Chiliburger squatting underneath a table. Tossed him my dregs. He enjoyed the crumbs and passed on the lettuce.

I cannot say with a fair degree of certainty that the cilantro-frilled ABC Burger is the city’s best burger, but I would not hesitate to say that it is the stretch of Pico between La Cienega and Fairfax’s best burger. Best of all, the place has got a grungy-looking Raiden arcade game shoved inside a stuffy, unused dining room. Let me think. What other flourescent shacks offer grimy video games for the casual diner?

I whiled away a few hours on the Raiden console. The sun began to set over the water. I got the sixth-highest score and entered Jeff Chiliburger’s name. Finally it was time to take my leave. I said my goodbyes to the pigeon and the Raiden game and went home. Once home I began asking Jeeves all these questions about LA Burger. Where did it come from? Is it the city’s best burger? Why pink? Why cilantro fringe? Why Sunday? I’m checking the Citysearch. I’m checking. Can’t find it. Can’t find it. Can’t… wait. Found it.

THEY ARE THE BEST ON THE WEST
Posted by NIKKI29 on 07/02/2002
1 out of 1 people found this review helpful

(Restaurant Highly Recommended) LA BURGERS ARE GOOD, THE SERVICE IS GOOD. THEY HAVE ALL TYPES OF BURGERS AND THEY COOK THEM WHEN ORDERED, I WOULD RATE THEM A 10+. IF YOU HAVE NOT BEEN YOU NEED TO GO TRY THEM OUT, THEY ALSO HAVE A ALL-DAY BREAKFAST MENU…….

I liked Nikki29’s style. I clicked in. Kept reading. Nikki29 continued:

Wild Rivers
(Directory Highly Recommended) Wild Rivers is the all-time best water park in Southern California, at most water parks you stand in line till you are completly dry waiting to get on the next ride, not at Wild Rivers. They do have cool rides, … more… 07/02/2002

Pit Bar-b-que
(Restaurant Highly Recommended) MY FAMILY HAS BEEN GOING HERE FOR YEARS AND THE BAR-B- QUE IS THE “BOMB”, YOU REALLY CANNOT FIND GOOD BAR B QUE ANYMORE, THEY HAVE BEEN AROUND FOR YEARS AND THE FOOD IS STILL “THE BOMB” more… 06/28/2002

Steve Harvey Morning Show (The Beat 100.3)
(Directory Highly Recommended) Steve Harvey and The Angels, are extra funny. If you are having a bad morning, you need to listen in and they will uplift your day!!!. Steve is off the hook and never bites his tongue, which is good. If … more…06/28/2002

Nikki29, you had me at LA Burger. But wait, my friend. This story does not end with a few historic and totally unrelated citysearch reviews. This story continues. I thought my affair with LA burger was finished after that fateful Sunday spent hunched over Raiden belching cilantro in a steamy back room. I was wrong.

Less than a week later, I found myself inexplicably watching television. Not only watching television, but drawn into a mindless Kaiser Permanente HMO ad featuring the Postal Service. The music drew me in. Their ploy worked. I was paying very little attention to the screen but I had been effectively turned into a zombee for 30 seconds. Suddenly – Lo and Behold! – the unmistakeable pink facade of LA BURGER filled my screen. I was both ecstatic and dubious until I saw the ad again twenty minutes later, and then I became strictly ecstatic. Here’s the ad. You can’t miss it.

After shouting “Holy Shit, it’s LA Burger!” to the TV a few times, I realized something about myself. New-agey mystics, people who have just finished reading the Celestine Prophecy and, for some reason, raw food enthusiasts often have this ability to ramble in your ear for hours on end about synchronicity. Carl Jung. The idea that nothing on the planet is a coincidence and that things are in total sync, provided you just tune in.

I am one with them now. I’m in tune. I’m in the chiliburger zone. I’m on that plane. Through all these postings about hot dogs, chiliburgers and dodgy-looking shacks in LA, I’ve changed from within. I have achieved total shackronicity. Nikki29 is right there with me. I’ve come to discover she’s the account executive responsible for the footage in the ad. Shackronicity. I’m staying for the season. It’s nice in here.

» Profile: The Original Marty’s

L.A. Burger
6001 W. Pico Blvd
323.938.4300
4 blocks west of la cienega
7am-9pm daily

The Original Marty’s Home of the Combo
10558 W Pico Blvd
310.836.6944