L.A. Concert Calendar: February 13 – 19

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1. Ron February 14, 2006 at 10:46 am · Reply →

   Thanks Charlie–JMP on humpday.

2. The Egyptian Lover February 14, 2006 at 10:28 am · Reply →

   Dr. Flushinpants:
   I appreciate your interest in my sobriquet. Let me end any controversy here. I make no boast of being more of a lover than the legendary Ramses II, or indeed, any of the pharaohs of the 19th & 20th dynasties of Egypt. Even the ill-fated Ramses III. My name is strictly an homage (pronounced “oh-maj”) to those kings and their sexual vitality. On a sidenote, let me say that I didn’t think much of Yul Brenner’s over the top portrayal of Ramses in The Ten Commandments.
   Best wishes,
   E.L.

3. charlie bucket February 14, 2006 at 10:07 am · Reply →

   the j rocc thing on wed is called JMP (pronounced Jump) not Hump

4. Dr. Chauncey Flushinpants, Egyptologist February 14, 2006 at 7:07 am · Reply →

   Mr. Lover,
   Perhaps you are aware of the controversy over your name. Most Egyptologists agree that Ramses II, with his 99 wives and 101 children, was the original and true Egyptian Lover. How do you respond to this?

5. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 10:04 pm · Reply →

   Ron:
   I appreciate your curiousity. First of all, I must thank you for understanding that “Egyptian Lover” does indeed refer to my love of all things Egyptian, not that I am Egyptian myself. This seems straightforward, but you would not believe how many times I have to clarify that I am not in fact Egyptian. That said, I have numerous loves within Egypt. Many will tell you that Cairo has the most to offer, with its mosques or palaces, or the Pyramids in Giza but I myself have always loved the slower pace of Luxor, in the south, on the bank of the Nile. If I could be there now at sunset, sipping a karkaday juice, that would be lovely. I will say this is what I love most about Egypt today. It might be a different answer another day. I would love to share more with you, but it is now time for 24 and Jack Bauer is really in the soup this week.
   Sincerely,
   E.L.

6. Ron February 13, 2006 at 7:07 pm · Reply →

   Egyptian Lover,
   What do you love most about Egypt?

   Cheers!
   Ron

7. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 4:54 pm · Reply →

   Ryan:
   While there are many variations over the correct way to set a table, I will give you my prefered place setting layout, which is a modern take on a the traditional arrangement. First off, I will assume you are not having a fish course and that you are American. (A fish course has its own ettiqute requirements, and there are some European style differences.) It is helpful if you picture a clockface. Working from left to right, from the 9 o’clock to 3 o’clock axis lay out in this order: Salad fork, dinner fork, dinner plate, dinner knife, soup spoon, teaspoon. At 10 o’clock, you have a salad plate; at 11 o’clock, your bread plate and butter knife; at 2 o’ clock, your glassware: water, wine, and champagne. Some will swap the wine and champagne, but I prefer it this way. Finally, you place your napkin upon the dinner plate (fancy fold, of course) and your coffee cup and saucer at 3 o’clock. And don’t forget: That soup spoon is also your dessert spoon. A lot of people forget this one. Good luck with the dinner. Let me know how it goes.
   Warm regards,
   E.L.

8. ryan February 13, 2006 at 4:29 pm · Reply →

   Egyptian Lover,

   I’ve been tasked with entertaining some business clients from out of town. Specifically, I’m to host dinner in my home. Grilling steaks is no problem. However, I’m one of these guys plagued with confusion over setting the table at semi-formal gatherings. Can you explain, once and for all, how I should set the table for this event?

   Thanks for all that you do,
   ryan

9. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 4:13 pm · Reply →

   Fresh Kid Ice:
   You are quite humorous, making a pun with the meaning of “wax.” I earlier mentioned that I presently use a light pomade on my hair, but your joke is noted–good one on me.
   All the best,
   E.L.

10. Fresh Kid Ice February 13, 2006 at 4:00 pm · Reply →

    Egyptian Lover,
    Did you use the same process you described to Sheila to give your hair its curly sheen?

    P.S. Oh, Oh Sheila – OH! OH! OH! Oh Sheila…

11. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 3:26 pm · Reply →

    Sheila:
    While you did not specify what type of carpet you are speaking about (shag, Berber, etc.), this technique works with most kinds of carpet:
    Heat an iron to the medium-to-high heat setting. Place a brown paper bag over the wax stain. Run the iron over it slowly, with little pressure. Basically, you want to heat the wax back to a liquid state, then you can soak it up with the paper bag. You must be careful not to work it deeper into the fibers, so use a light touch. Hope that works out for you.
    Take care,
    E.L.

12. Sheila February 13, 2006 at 3:21 pm · Reply →

    Dear Egyptian Lover:
    What is the best way to remove candle wax from carpet?
    Thanks!

13. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 12:52 pm · Reply →

    I appreciate your complements on my coiffure.

    Yes, I admit I did use a large amount of activator in the past! Today, however, I use a light wax pomade (I forget what it’s called) through towel dry hair and let it air dry, as my hair is naturally curly. This gives my hair a nice shine while leaving it non-greasy.

    Regards,
    E.L.

14. MC Icy Fresh February 13, 2006 at 12:41 pm · Reply →

    Damn! Check out that Jeri Curl! Homeboy must have used at least two bottles of activator for that look!

15. The Egyptian Lover February 13, 2006 at 12:24 pm · Reply →

    Reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. I am far from dead, and, furthermore, my beats are still quite fresh.
    Best,
    -E.L.

16. Fresh Fly Kid February 13, 2006 at 11:21 am · Reply →

    Egyptian Lover?! I thought he was dead! I hope he’ll do a song with the surviving members of the L.A. Dream Team and the World Class Wreckin’ Crew. Time to go dry clean my satin jumpsuit and polish my fat gold chains!