Yo Majesty @ The Echo

If this were an episode of Gray’s Anatomy, you’d find me waking up on a Saturday morning in bed with Dr. Yang or Dr. Torres or Preston Burke naked and screaming “SERIOUSLY?” at the camera while Dido or Psapp played over my Hallmark Card musings and my beeper blows up while we cut to Bailey screaming “Where is that stupid intern? I need her here STAT.”

Instead, Saturday morning finds me waking up face down on my couch in my boots with writing all over my arm and my dog sleeping on my legs. I have vague memories of someone driving my car home the night before and either I decided to go get an enormous tattoo of the Aurora Borealis above my right knee, or I may have been kicked in the leg by a donkey. My phone has been ringing repeatedly for the last 20 minutes and in my Meredith Gray moment, I sit up on the couch, knocking the dog to the ground and say “SERIOUSLY? How did I get so drunk last night? I only had 3 beers!” Instead of Dido, though, an infomercial with Erik Estrada encouraging me to buy land at a vacation resort in Wisconsin is BLARING from the TV.

61 missed calls…ugh. I answer. It’s LaVerne and she’s going apeshit because I changed the alarm code at the Losanjealous building. Apparently Ryan and Victor have already been detained by our own rent-a-cops for typing the wrong code in 6 times.

“I sent you all an e-mail on Friday with the new password,” I yelled back. “It’s HORNEYGUY with an “E”! It’s not my fault you can’t misspell properly!”

Back to the couch to reflect on the night before. It all started innocently enough…. I went to the Echo to see Yo Majesty, who I’d recently just found out about after a friend told me to google “Kryptonite Pussy”. I really liked the 3 or 4 songs I found online. They were lo-fi and fun as hell and I figured I’d meet Tricia and Seamus there, dance my ass off and maybe get some good photos.

OH GOOD LORD ALMIGHTY, I had no idea what I was in for as they took the stage. Let me preface this by saying I’ve been to some pretty crazy shows. I saw Shane McGowan on St. Patrick’s Day in Ireland and left soaked in beer, blood and what might have been vomit. Some drunken frat boys threw me on stage once at a Jane’s Addiction show which got me detained by security for the rest of the show… and back in Ohio I saw some band called Boom and The Legion of Doom that, soon after they started playing started playing, chucked rotten innards and pigs heads at us. As I was running for the door, the singer pegged me with a deer liver at high speed which knocked me down a flight of stairs and into some fashion punk. I sprained my ankle, he probably broke his wrist but neither one of us went to the hospital because we were scared and underage. I would have to put this show into this category… the “holy shit what just happened” category.

One minute we were dancing around screaming “Fuck that shit! Fuck that shit!” with them and the next minute they’ve given us a bottle of Hennessy that we’re chugging with them (Tricia and I finished it), we’re all onstage, Tricia is getting serenaded, one of them is topless, people are climbing all over each other and hugging, everybody’s on the mic, Mr. T gets smashed again, everybody’s screaming. There’s crotch grabbing, tit slinging we’re all getting sprayed with stuff and at the end of it all you realize… you didn’t just stand there and watch them perform. They blew the fucking roof off the place and took everyone with them.

I haven’t been to a show like this in years and I have no idea who all the people on stage were… including a 60-something year old white guy dancing his ass off. “What the fuck just happened???!!!” is right. I don’t know if all their shows are like this but I seriously doubt it was a one-off. Chicago, New York, Baltimore and Austin… get ready. If you miss this you’re a fucking fool.

Click pics to see NSFW versions and many more at flickr.