The Last Tito’s Supper
By Ron - Wednesday April 11th 2007 |
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The Last Tito’s Supper
Artist Unknown, ca. 1987
Oil on Canvas
Tito’s Permanent Collection
The Last Tito’s Supper is a modern portrayal of the da Vinci masterpiece. It depicts the reaction of the twelve apostles at Tito’s Tacos as Jesus drops the bombshell that one of them will betray him. Each disciple reacts differently to the news with varying degrees of horror. From left to right:
Matthew, James, and Bartholomew form a group of three. All are surprised.
Judas is wearing a white t-shirt and jeans in the shadow, laughing his fool ass off. He is clutching a small bag, signifying the silver given to him as payment to betray Jesus or perhaps a takeout order.
James and Philip are clearly upset. A doubtful Thomas, represented as Mikael Gorbachev, sits in front of a metaphor for the Berlin Wall, intimating the era’s Cold War tensions.
Peter, the keeper of the keys to the kingdom of heaven also holds the keys to the white Chevy Caprice in the background. Parking at Tito’s, even during the sacraments, is a bitch.
The feminine disciple John, depicted as Michael Jackson, appears to swoon. (NOTE: to this day several scholars argue that this is not Jackson but rather Sigourney Weaver. We may never know the truth.)
St. Andrew is portrayed as Michael J. Fox (born Michael ANDREW Fox). He holds up his hands in a “let’s all just calm the fuck down ” gesture in the exact manner of da Vinci’s painting.
An unflappable Jesus institutes the Eucharist by sharing beef tacos with his disciples.
Two apostles are not pictured. Jude Thaddeus is playing Pole Position and Simon is grabbing extra napkins for the table.
The painting contains several references to the number ten. There are ten subjects pictured, Andrew is holding up ten fingers, and the bench and table supports are positioned in the shape of the Roman numeral ten. These are allusions to both the Ten Commandments as well as the cost for extra cheese in the late 80′s.
Compare and contrast to the O.G.:
I sense a DaTito Code in the making if we are not careful. Please, somebody suppress this page from Dan Brown’s IP address immediately.
A compelling exegesis, though it leaves one to wonder why the Tito’s Jesus is bogarting all the tacos.
In any event, I look forward to future installments such as “The Stations of El Coyote” and “The Passion of Pink’s Chili Dogs”.
This moment is captured before the transubstantiation–Tito’s Jesus is in the process of blessing the tacos. It’s a subtle but noteworthy departure from da Vinci’s vision.