Ten Random Questions For Aziz Ansari

Rising pop star Aziz Ansari hits Largo this weekend (see: Pick of the Week) for his Glow In The Dark tour. We speak with him briefly in two languages today.

Aziz. You “won” the second best Los Angeles concert of 2008 on our site for a 20-minute set at the Orpheum last summer. Question. Why didn’t you win top honors? (Where did the failure occur?) Discuss.

Clearly, Radiohead had a few fans who were more adept at having robots vote for them over and over. I hope that Radiohead’s scheme to beat me left a huge carbon footprint. The fans know who really won.

Describe if you will your songwriting process.

I like to set my room up with pomegranate candles and put on a CD called The Sounds of My Favorite Waterfalls by Glenn Dutch. I blindfold my eyes, put a pen in my hand, and the rest takes care of itself.

What was civilization like back in the 90s?

Everyone was really into the album Throwing Copper by Live.

Lordy! All my neighbors were totally into that album in olden times. Eight million copies and rising, those guys were the Kanye of their time. Sing it with me:

When exactly does MIA’s restraining order against you expire?

She just renewed after an incident where I got a job at her favorite Pinkberry to try to strike up conversations with her every Tuesday. (Special bonus MIA gallery! – ed)

Ok. But when does your restraining order against Brooklyn Vegan expire?

The tough thing about Dave is he has facial reconstructive surgery every two weeks to stay anonymous and get his photos. Due to this limitation, I’ve been unable to procure a restraining order, because he’s a man without a steady face.

I should like very much to address you now in Tamil. (Beg pardon, readers. Go get a coffee) . . . Ithi yenithi pa?

Na nala pasa mudiathi. Alli nah, puryamata.

Are you taking the over or under for the Steelers/Ravens game?

Sports rule! (I know nothing about sports, but I’m really good at foosball and table tennis, especially foosball.)

Beards: Pros/Cons? Discuss. (Trick question: There are no cons!)

Here’s my tip: I just got back from the IBHMC (International Beard Having Men Conference) and the keynote address was about how shorter beards are in.

Two words: Slumdog Millionaire. Go.

I did genuinely feel somewhat proud to see them win all those awards at the Golden Globe. It was a strange feeling. Obviously, I had nothing to do with the movie and it was just that the movie had a lot of people involved with my skin color and ethnicity. It made me wonder if white people are just fired up like that about everything.

Finally, any advice for Barack Obama? (Did you know Obama is only 25?!)

Let Damon Weaver interview you on 20/20!!!!

Peace be with you, Aziz. See you Saturday.

Aziz Ansari appears regularly on MTV’s Human Giant, follows Kanye West’s blog religiously and has been named one of “Nine to Watch in 2009” by Entertainment Weekly. Watch him in 2009 this Saturday at Largo. (*If you are a computer programmer adept at robotically ballot-stuffing online polls to tip the odds into your favor, you are particularly encouraged to attend and introduce yourself.)

» Aziz blog: Azizisbored.com
» Aziz Ansari at the Orpheum Theater, May 30, 2008 (Exclusive photos of Los Angeles’ Second Best Concert of 2008 by Sung)