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The Westside Rentals Hearse: A Line-By-Line Study

By Ryan - Thursday November 15th 2007

WSR hearse

Of all the content on this website, few posts generate as many passionately eloquent arguments as the individual articles regarding Westside Rentals. Every renter in the city has formed a distinct opinion about the local rental behemoth and Losanjealous has, for better or worse, become the de facto dumping ground for said opinions. (“They’re useless!” “They’re the greatest!” “That last commenter was a plant from WSR!” “Stop calling me a plant because I am totally legit!” “Like hell you are!” And so forth.)

So be it, then. Today we look at one of the company’s nefarious advertising vessels: The Westside Rentals Hearse. Join us as we scrutinize the vehicle’s advertising messages, line-by-line, after the jump.

I. SIDE VIEW

WSR hearse

Top to bottom, left to right
NOTE: Unless otherwise indicated, all fonts all-cap “scary drip” varietal

i. NEED A PLACE TO LIVE!

  1. Car is not posing a question
  2. Car is emphatic about finding place to live


ii. RENT AND LIVE

  1. Car may be subtly suggesting viewer can avoid death by renting


iii. RENT

  1. Rent


iv. AND LIVE

  1. And live. Again, car may be subtly suggesting viewer will die, unless viewer rents


v. WHY DIE WHEN YOU CAN RENT WESTSIDE RENTALS WESTSIDERENTALS.COM

  1. Extraneous “Die-not” slash element creates confusing Ghostbuster effect


vi. OWN (323) 634-RENT

  1. Vertical grouping of text shows these two items to be tangentially and not necessarily directly related
  2. Car is not suggesting that you may own a phone number


vii. Visual: Man Rising From Coffin

  1. Outline of a man rising from a coffin drinking a glass of (presumed) mulled wine.
    [Note: Said outline is strikingly similar to a character depicted in the
    Huckleberry Finn coloring book stashed in one of the drawers of the garden room at my grandmother's house (read into this confession what you will)].

II. REAR

WSR hearse

i. LIFE IS
ii. TOO SHORT
iii. USE
iv. WESTSIDERENTALS.COM
v. (323) 634-RENT

Overall Notes:

  1. Jarring font transition to arial on rear window surface reduces car’s overall “Munster Effect” considerably.
  2. Punctuation?

At this point as per tradition it is customary to commence loving/bashing Westside Rentals in our acclaimed comment section™, registration-free since inception, May 2005. You may begin.




What now?

8 Responses to “The Westside Rentals Hearse: A Line-By-Line Study”

  1. Posted by Charlie Lesoine 11/15/07 at 3:27 pm # Reply

    Westside rentals is a racket. They are like the mafia. It is REALLY hard to find an appartment without westside rentals in the area I was looking (sm,venice,mda,mv,cc)

  2. Posted by Charlie 11/15/07 at 4:46 pm # Reply

    Conversely, I’ve worked for EZrentlist in the past which is pretty much exactly the same as WSR and the two companies just talk mad shit about eachother in advertisements and deceive customers. And all these comapnies do is snatch for rent ads from newspapers and do things you shouldn’t be too lazy to do for yourselves. These types of companies are way sleazy and only exist to profit off of customers who don’t qualify for refunds. Instead of shelling out 60 bones to these crooks go buy some sandwhiches and pass them out to homeless people as you drive around looking for “for rent” signs.

  3. Posted by TopNTail 11/15/07 at 5:23 pm # Reply

    They should throw their bogus lists into that hearse along with their bait and switch adverts that always become on hold for someone else once you pay them and are always available when you have not paid.

  4. Posted by that owl 11/15/07 at 8:31 pm # Reply

    Please keep all those nefarious advertising vessels in California. Please do your best to not let them spread to the midwest. Thank you. That is all.

  5. Posted by Julia in Echo Park 11/15/07 at 9:57 pm # Reply

    I don’t think “Own” is supposed to go with the phone number, it’s supposed to replace the “die-not,” as in, “Why own when you can rent.” Not that I’m sticking up for them, or anything….

  6. Posted by james 2/5/08 at 3:32 pm # Reply

    I got my first apartment through craigslist, but there was lot of interference by landlords regarding small small issues.
    I decided to change my apartment and begin the search for new apartment. This time I got registered with westside rentals, and they stood up by my expectations . I am just living hassle free life for last 3 months and I am not getting any interference from landlords.
    When it comes to pay $60 to get registered, initially people think that its not worth, but when one get registered with westside rentals and enjoy their services, then people find it is great.Its really worth $60. I can bet it especially for the area near Los Angeles and santa-monica.They are really putting a lot of efforts to increase their customer’s satisfaction on daily basis.
    Westside Rentals has really increased the number of apartments in their lists just few months before. They update their site atleast 2 times a day, adding new apartments and offers. Lots of landlords have signed up with them, making their lists more longer.
    I am really tankful to westside rentals.

  7. Posted by Bad to Worse | Los Angeles Metblogs 3/15/08 at 4:18 pm # Reply

    [...] be bad with the housing market crash: earlier today, just by chance, I saw the Westside Rentals Advertising Hearse being escorted into the city impound in Lincoln Heights. Sure, it might be due to some parking [...]

  8. Posted by jenny in the valley 8/5/08 at 9:08 pm # Reply

    i actually used ezrentlist and westside rentals last month. i was pretty hard up for a good rental and ezrentlist found me one first. bad thing is they didnt have much photos

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