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A Jig for St. Pat’s: The Losanjealous St. Patrick’s Day Boozing Guide

By Ryan - Friday March 17th 2006

abrechaunA-Tiddly, Diddle-Tee Dee!,
The luck o’ the Irish to Ye!
Ta-Dee, DeeDee, DEEE!,
Ta-Dong, Da-Da-DONNNG!,
A-Diddly, Diddly, DONG!, (Ta-Dee).

A-Tiddly, Diddle-Tee Dee!,
T’will be Bushmills-on-ice for Thee!
Ta-Dee, DeeDee, DEEE!,
Ta-Dong, Da-Da-DONNNG!,
A-Diddly, Diddle-Dee, DONG!, (Ta-Dee).

As you lather up with Irish Spring and venture forth this evening, remember ye golden rule of cultural beer-sales-driven holidays: ONLY MEXICAN BARS AT ST PAT’S, ONLY IRISH PUBS AT CINCO DE MAYO. You know this. Repeat it to yourself eighty times before you walk out that door this evening. Once for each snake St. Patrick smote with a stick his first thirty metres.

Now then! On to the evening bar guide. Brief but effective. Look for the drunk, blurry leprechaun giving you the finger seal of approval for your best chance at a normal place to take the bite off another work week:

drunkrechaun

Westside
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
Cock and Bull Finn McCool’s
Magic Johnson’s TGIFriday’s O’Brien’s (Main Street)
Joker
O’Dickums
Red Garter Brennan’s
The Talpa Patrick Molloy’s
Fairfax
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
El Carmen Tom Bergin’s House of Irish Chafing
Snakepit (bring stick for smiting) Molly Malone’s
Monroe’s St. Nick’s
Losanjealous recommends you both go to and avoid:
Canter’s
Hollywood / Li’l Armenia
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
Coach and Horses Cat & Fiddle
GrAsshopper Three Clubs (clubs :: shamrocks)
Power House Pig ‘n’ Whistle
Blacklight La Poubelle
Koreatown
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
Prince Nowhere!
OB Bear
Dansungsa
For The Good Time
Rosen Brewery
Frank ‘N’ Hank’s
Zip
HMS Bounty
Anyplace whatsoever
Far East/Atwater/Glendale/Pasadena
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
Footsie’s Tam O’Shanter Inn
Red Lion Tavern
Bigfoot Lodge
Damon’s
McMurphy’s
35er Moose McGillishiddy’s
San Gabriel Valley
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
The Venice Room Anything that looks suspiciously Irish. These are Chinese waters!
Bahooka
San Fernando Valley
Losanjealous recommends you get plastered at: Losanjealous recommends you wholeheartedly avoid:
Corbin Bowl Ireland’s 32
Blue Room

Me? I’ll be making a brief appearance at every single bar on this page. I’m Irish. Ta-Diddly-Dong-Dee! See you out there. Hire a driver.




What now?

8 Responses to “A Jig for St. Pat’s: The Losanjealous St. Patrick’s Day Boozing Guide”

  1. Posted by JT 3/17/06 at 2:58 am # Reply

    I went to McMurphy’s in Pasadena once on St. Patty’s day and refused to pay their outrageous cover (what was it now….$20??). And that got you nothing…no cup, no drink specials, NOTHING. Just the honor of spending your hard earned green on some green beer. Um not thanks. And good luck with the running a business thing and making money. Top o’ the Morning to you arseholes.

  2. Posted by Caroline 3/17/06 at 8:23 am # Reply

    This list is brilliant! And here I was thinking that I needed to avoid bars altogether on the drinking holidays. But why cut the nose to spite the face, or whatever the appropriate saying is here.

  3. Posted by Ron 3/17/06 at 9:55 am # Reply

    Any other day of the year O’Dickums is the place to be.

  4. Posted by Drunken Irish Magoo 3/17/06 at 1:09 pm # Reply

    I’ll ta piss myself friendless in a dank embankment all unbeknownst before I sip a wee bit ‘o the creature at Red Garter, or anyplace else within walkin’ distance.

  5. Posted by tim 3/17/06 at 4:17 pm # Reply

    also, we’re hitting a place in the valley as tom bergins is now out of the plan. Springbok (south african) sports bar and grille on victory bl 1/2 west of woodley ave on the south end of the van nuys 3 par golf course.

  6. Posted by Joel 3/17/06 at 5:13 pm # Reply

    No mention of Downtown L.A.? McCormick and Schmicks, Caseys, Cole’s, Weiland, Daily Grill, etc., lots of watering holes. BTW, the parade was today.

  7. Posted by Defamer 3/17/06 at 6:03 pm # Reply

    Short Ends: Eva Longoria Opens Mouth, Says Yet Another Stupid Thing

    · Eva Longoria has apparently told Allure magazine that boyfriend Tony Parker has slept with only one other person in his life and that she’s the “teacher” in their relationship….

  8. Posted by Pete 3/17/06 at 7:41 pm # Reply

    I ate lunch today with a friend of mine from high school. He was wearing an orange shirt and I cannot believe that I did not once point it out in all its ballsiness.

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