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Happy Crash Day

By Victor - Tuesday April 04th 2006

Product unitToday has been declared Crash Day by Mayor Tony V. So for just for one day, L.A., can you all please stop acting like the fucking hateful racists that you all are? I will do my part, if you will do yours. For today, in honor of Crash Day, I will not view others through the prism of race/ethnicity and stereotype, but instead will look at them as human beings. For example, when I get my lunchtime falafel at the hookah joint up the block and he skimps on the hummus, like always, today I will not shout “What gives, Osama? Saving up for the jihad?”

And so we invite you to take the pledge with us and comment with examples of how you will not be racist for one day in honor of Crash Day.

If you won’t take the pledge with us, maybe you should come out from behind the metal and glass that keeps you away from humanity and head to Best Buy to pick up the new 2-disc DVD set (in stores today) and learn something. Here is what you get for $16.99:

Disc 1:
Director’s Cut with 4 additional minutes of footage extending several scenes
DVD Introduction by Director Paul Haggis
Trailers
Disc 2:
Deleted Scenes with Director Commentary
“Behind the Metal and Glass” Making of Crash
On Paul Haggis – Featurette
“LA – The Other Main Character” Featurette
Unspoken Featurette
Bird York “In the Deep” Music Video
Music Montages
Script-to-Screen Comparisons
Storyboard-to-Screen Comparisons

Those 4 additional minutes of footage should do you some good, you racist prick.

UPDATE 3:45 p.m.: Goddammit, I couldn’t get through the day without my deep seeded Angeleno racist tendency revealing itself. I made it past the falafel guy OK with some deep breathing exercises, but afterwards the Korean guy in the lobby shop shortchanged me and then a shaved-headed Mexican UPS guy splashed me with his truck. And, yep, I went there. I’ve placed my order for the DVD.




What now?

6 Responses to “Happy Crash Day”

  1. sherrie : 4/4/06 at 1:14 pm

    And to think, if things had gone the other way maybe today we’d be dressing up like cowboys and celebrating…other things.

  2. Citizen MFV : 4/4/06 at 1:28 pm

    Fuck racism. ZToday, I’m about sexist piggism. When I get my lunchtime falafel, I’ll say, “Hey Sharmouta, you got a nice set of cans on ya.”

  3. Jez : 4/4/06 at 1:35 pm

    OK, well can we still be racist tomorrow?

  4. [...] Greaaaaat – that’s all we need. Pretty soon, to “Crash“ will no longer be defined as finding the physical contact we so thirst for as we’ve learned from the movie and from Crash day here in Los Angeles, rather, it will return to its more humble definition: bitches crashing their cars because they’ll be a gazillion times more likely to crash when talking to their agents, writing their screenplays, and formulating their household Excel budget while driving.  [...]

  5. Dr. Lao : 4/5/06 at 11:59 am

    We SHOULD have been dressing up as cowboys and celebrating other things…

  6. Citizen MFV : 4/6/06 at 9:22 am

    I blame W…

    Like something out of the old Mad Magazine, back when it was funny.

    http://www.myleftwing.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=4559

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