Rosy Palms
By Pete - Wednesday June 21st 2006 |
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Between March 2004 and April 2006, I lived in a cozy 1950s fourplex in western Palms, just up the street from Cafe Brasil. Life was good: I had my own garage, the rent was cheap, and I was never more than 30 minutes from USC, where I’m a grad student. I do miss the old nabe sometimes so let’s take a tour of ye olde stomping grounds.
Our journey begins at one of Palms’ landmarks. What’s so special about this boring-ass little Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf? Well, it was on TV. Ooh! Yes, this was the diner on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the show that allowed the nation’s geeks, dweebs, and spazzes the chance–if only for an hour a week–to imagine a world in which weirdos were actually good-looking. The sign for the Long’s and the TJ’s thankfully covers up the “JAMDAT” sign on the ugly 1980s office building in the background. Anyone who’s ever been stuck on the northbound 405–which, if I’m not mistaken, is at least 78% of the human race–should recognize it.
The next stop is right across the parking lot. Guelaguetza is, dollar for dollar, probably the best restaurant on the Westside. The fact that it shares a building with a dry cleaner and a water store makes it that much more awesome. The DÃa de los Muertos paraphernalia on the walls is also a nice touch. Gustavo Arellano says that there’s a Oaxacan place in Orange County that blows Guelaguetza out of the water, but I refuse to believe him.
Here’s Ryan’s favorite intersection! Notice how I deftly navigated to the correct lane continuing eastbound on National, rather than dumping myself onto the Santa Monica Freeway at 4 PM.
Two of Palms’ most revered institutions: Irish Times and the ass-ugly 1950s dingbat box apartment building.
Taco Plus: making the independent taqueria safe for Baja Fresh-loving gabachos.
Probably the cheapest gas on the Westside is at National and Castle Heights. My roommate rides his bike by here every morning at 4:45 on the way to work in Beverly Hills and says it’s busy even then. And yes, the fact that I can use the phrase “cheap gas” to describe $3.25 regular is causing my left lower eyelid to twitch again.
This building once housed a giant rectifier that provided DC power for the Red Cars that went to Santa Monica, Venice, and ultimately to Redondo Beach (via Playa del Rey). Now, it houses the theater company of a giant rectum, Tim Robbins.
The Museum of Jurassic Technology: come for the Mount Wilson Observatory letters, stay for the Pope John Paul II single human hair sculpture.
Versailles, where even the tap water has garlic and lemon pepper in it.
This delightfully faux-Deco mixed-use development had signs out front calling it “The Victor” announcing it would be ready for tenants in Spring 2006, but those signs have disappeared. Shame. I would love to live in a building with that name, or perhaps “The Conqueror,” “The Generalissimo,” or “The Bill DeMarco.”
I hate Ayn Rand and “Objectivism” like a genital wart, but I can’t say I disagree with the hero of The Fountainhead about classical columns on post offices and banks. But hey–now I know where to go when I need a sling for my AR-15.
Decent food at Gaby’s and an ever-changing cast of hot Brazilian waitresses who will give you amazingly shitty service if you don’t look like a bed-tanned, $400-sunglasses-wearing Industry type from the Sony studios just across Venice.
Picture yourself as a developer in the 1950s. “Hmm, I’ve got this piece of land here on Venice…what to do, what to do…oh, I know! I’ll build some ass-ugly, soul-crushing concrete duplex bungalows, and then paint them Sea Foam Green to make them look even uglier! Yeah!”
There’s a severe gluteal mismatch between this store’s customer base and its mannequins.
I think I had the $6.95+tax (coming out to $7.52 exactly) Executive Lunch at Cafe Brasil at least 2-3 times/week in 2005. Gloriously marinated chicken breast, spicy black beans, rice, salsa, and fried plantains. I took my folks here once and they asked, “Honestly, why would you eat anything else?” I responded, “I don’t know. I just don’t know.”
After a long period of 18th Street dominance, it appears that the Sotel barrio is trying to muscle in on the lucrative business of selling blow to white college graduates. Oh, Palms, how I love you.
hah, awesome, i lived in Palms last year. for some reason, i never made it to the museum of jurassic technology even though it was like 2 or 3 blocks from me.
Hooray for Palms! Finally getting it’s due!
Ah, Palms. I had an apartment there from 1985-1993.(Back when the Irish Times was a German restaurant). I read some where The Surplus Store has columns because it originally was a bank, and was used as a location in Laurel and Hardy films. Is Hu’s still in business, on the corner of National and National?
I’m pretty sure the Surplus Store occupies what used to be Palms’ post office. Loads of small-town post offices were built in the neoclassical style during the period 1900-1920, which is when Palms’ would have been built.
Hu’s is a rinky-dink fast-food Chinese place, right? I seem to remember there being one across the street from the TJ’s. When I lived in Palms and wanted cheap, inauthentic Chinese, I usually would walk over to San Hing, which is in a strip mall across from Guelaguetza.
BTW, Bill, it appears from your website that your offices are located less than a block from Taqueria Sanchez. I trust that you’ve patronized that particular establishment. Damn, I can still taste the beef tenderloin burrito I got from their Centinela location yesterday.
BTW, Palms has an excellent online newspaper to which I frequently contributed during slow periods at USC. Check the “Letters” section for an argument in which I call two guys dumb rednecks for getting angry over receiving neighborhood council election materials in Spanish, and one of them responds by calling me an “ignorant liberal” and taking offense at my suggestion that he move to Phoenix or Denver (as if he’ll escape Latinos there, heh-heh-heh).
Yay, my neighborhood!
One of my favorite restaurants in the area is El Nopal, just diagonal across from Hu’s. Excellent Mexican food. There are a couple of other restaurants around there I haven’t tried yet, like a gelato place, a new vegan place, and an Indian place.
P.S. That dry cleaner’s (Crest) next to Guelaguetza is good and CHEAP. Whatever you do don’t go to to Sterling Cleaners @ Rose and Woodbine because they’ll charge you double…
Hey Pete thanks for the vote of confidence. I was going to flip some lofts down there in ’91 but my partner flaked. I said “Russ, Palms is blowing up like landmines, don’t back out on me now!” and he said something about how you are what you eat and he eats douchebags something something something.
It was going to be thirty units and we were going to call it “The Crestmont at the Bill DeMarco”.
If you’re ever in Antelope Valley and you run into a guy named Russ Crestmont remember to piss in his face. Sad but true.
The Victor: STILL ON. No retail component, though.
Bill, if I ever develop an apartment complex, I will make sure to call it the DeMarco.
All I can say is, “Palms, woot, woot!”
Hi, I really am thrilled by your site. It sends chills up my neck. Anything I can join?
I am writing a history of Palms, with lots of photographs. I need more, too. but they should be OLD! I already have enough modern ones.
See the rough draft at
ulwaf.com/palmstext.html
and some of the photos at
ulwaf.com/palmspix.html
The army surplus store used to be a bank. Citizens State Bank,according to the granite threshold of the building’s entrance.
http://www.quantumtom.com/?p=728