On the LAm, OC Edition: The Enormous Ears Bandit
Weight: 160 pounds
Wanted For: Bank Robbery
The suspect enters the bank and using a demand note asks for “Fiftys and Hundreds”. Tellers may not hear a word he says because they will be transfixed on his enormous ears. He simulates a weapon by putting his hand near his hip. Again bank employees might not even notice due to the suspect’s distractingly enormous ears. He then puts the money into his front pant pocket and flees on foot. Observers will wonder 1) how much wind resistance his enormous ears must be causing, 2) how he manages not to trip over his enormous ears, or 3) both. He is believed to be in the area, possibly living in mo–HOLY CHRIST I CAN’T GET OVER HOW FUCKING ENORMOUS HIS EARS ARE!!!