In Which Victor Yet Again Falls Prey to Overpriced Cute Food
SCENE OF THE CUTE CRIME: The Colony Cafe, Pico Blvd.
CUTE ITEM: “BTLA” Burger – Bacon (Hickory smoked), Lettuce Tomato, Avocado.
NOT-SO-CUTE PRICE: $9.75
I know, I know. Should have seen this one coming–from the canopies on the windows, the faux handwritting menu, all around beachy interior vibe. But I had a meeting in the area, so said what the hell, haven’t been here in a while. The menu has this curious schism between light fare and meaty items and I wanted a burger.
The first tip off that I was headed down the wrong path might have been the executive secretary and stay-at-home mom types grazing on chopped salads out of clear plastic bowls on this random weekday. Never a good indicator of quality or value. Second tip off was the two size mug options for dine-in coffee–every dine-in joint worth their salt has ONE DAMNED COFFEE MUG SIZE and you refill that bad boy, for free, as needed. You don’t squeeze the customer for an extra few nickels on a coffee upgrade option. They aren’t serving Blue Bottle here for chrissakes. Third strike was, the bacon is not APPLEWOOD-SMOKED but HICKORY smoked. Everyone knows premium bacon MUST be APPLEWOOD-SMOKED. But I’ll let this one slide. Fourth strike then: the free “side” of lousy store-bought potato chips tossed in the basket. A ha-ha on the way out after they’ve already counted your money.
Truth is, though, the burger wasn’t bad. It was cute, as you can clearly see. It just wasn’t $9.75-good. Had no real charm. It’s basically a Howard’s Famous Bacon and Avocado Burger knockoff with higher-end ingredients. But then that Howard’s signature item is $5.35 or around there these days and just as satisfying, if not more, even if the ingredients aren’t organic or sustainably sourced or whatever.
Howard’s Famous Bacon & Avocado Burgers
11127 Venice Blvd, 90034