New York / LA: A Comparative(ly Foolish) Study
Fellow denizens, I’ve just returned from New York. New York! God damn it. What a city. All these “neighborhoods”… All this “walking”… All this “walking from neighborhood to neighborhood” … All this “riding the subway to get around” … God damn it. I love it. We don’t have it. We drive. So?
New York has working names for all its little areas. We do too. New York has hot dog shacks. Damn it, we have hot dog shacks. New York has a big park. Damn it, we have a big park. It’s uncanny, I tell you. God damn it. I’m going to side-by-side this one. It’s not comprehensive but it’s a start. I said it.
| Neighborhoods | They Have… | Which Means… | We Have… | Which Means… |
| NoLIta | North of Little Italy | NoLIta | No Little Italy (Does Maggiano’s count?) |
| SoHo | South of Houston | WeHo | West Hollywood |
| NoHo | North Hollywood | ||
| BeHo | Beneath the Hollywood Sign (formerly Beachwood. Ask around, it is totally uncool to say Beachwood) | ||
| TriBeCa | Triangle Below Canal | Culver City | Culver City |
| Chinatown | Chinatown | Chinatown | Chinatown |
| Bowery | Crazy Shit, Pricey Lofts | Venice |  Sunny Crazy Shit, Pricey Lofts |
| Brooklyn | Brooklyn | Van Nuys | Van Nuys (?) |
| Williamsburg | Silverlake | Silverlake | Williamsburg |
| World Trade Center | Financial district near Ground Zero | Celebrity Centre | Eighteen-block radius surrounding Celeb Centre. BeHo adjacent. |
| Parks | |||
| They Have… | Which Means… | We Have… | Which Means… |
| Central Park | Drugs, Bicycles, Ice Skating, Paul Simon concerts, Garth Brooks concerts | Griffith Park | Drugs, Ponies, Batcaves, Gipsy Kings concerts, Jack Johnson concerts |
| Elysian Park | Drugs, Dodgers | ||
| MacArthur Park | Drugs, pastrami | ||
| Food | |||
| They Have… | Which Means… | We Have… | Which Means… |
| Katz’s | Pastrami, dive bars | Langer’s | Pastrami, fake IDs |
| Gray’s Papaya | Cheap hangover helper | Oki-Dog | Scares You Sober |
It’s getting out of hand. I’m stopping. But think about it. Along with our Towns (China, Korea, Thai, Historic Filipino) we have a scattering of Littles: India, Tokyo, Armenia, Saigon. Then the non-littles come into play: Crenshaw, South Central, Long Beach, Boyle Heights, Highland Park, East LA, LA Proper. SG Valley. Hills Hollywood and Beverly. Suburbank. West Valley. Pasadena, Palms, South Bay. Aw hell, I quit. I’m no expert on either city. I just know how to put together a fancypants chart. Feel free to add categories and I’ll update as needed. Have a time of it.
