Cinderella Man Refund Excuses
By Ron - Wednesday June 29th 2005 |
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AMC Theaters is so confident that Cinderella Man is one of the finest movies of the year that they are offering a money-back guarantee if you don’t agree.
When the theater manager asks why you didn’t enjoy the movie, feel free to use one of these excuses:
- Too derivative
- Too predictable
- Not feel-good enough
- No Stallone
- Fell asleep
- In constant fear I’d get hit with phone
- Too Formulaic
- Too Anachronistic: At one point – given as 1933 – Braddock reports a dream of dining at the Ritz with Mickey Rooney. Then only 13, Mickey Rooney was in the film business but not a name to recognize in Braddock’s slum. He starred in a series of comedy shorts at the time, but going by the name of Mickey McGuire. Only from the late 1930s through the 1940s would Mickey Rooney become a top star and household name.
- Spite
- I deserve better
Take the Cinderella Man Challenge at the AMC in Westwood, Century City or Burbank.
Cinderella Man = Fistbiscuit (Man/Horse in the Depression-era makes America feel good about itself again.) But this money-back guarantee is a great find. Here’s the plan: 1) Find a multiplex playing Cinderella Man and War of the Worlds around the same time. 2) Buy Cinderella Man ticket. 3) Watch War of the Worlds instead. 4) Request refund for Cinderella Ticket. 5) Leave theater with your $14 and dignity.